


you were never gone

by okaypottah



Category: Shadowhunters
Genre: Hurt Alec, M/M, Malec, Protective Magnus Bane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-04-06
Packaged: 2019-04-19 02:59:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14227647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okaypottah/pseuds/okaypottah
Summary: always, my love





	you were never gone

**Author's Note:**

> since this is my first shadowhunter fic ever, please be generous while leaving kudos and constructive criticism! 
> 
> not proofread cause i was so eXCITED so pls ignore any mistakes k
> 
> hope you enjoy!

Fingers heavily adorned by rings tap away on the wooden surface of the table. Magnus chews on his bottom lip, a slightly uneasy feeling growing in the pit of his stomach.   
  
He doesn't know what it is, but something's wrong. Something- he isn't sure what, but he could _feel_ it.   
  
Feel his stomach twist into knots and his otherwise calm demeanor falter bit by bit.   
  
To be fair, he'd had a pretty busy week. Meetings to attend, clients to meet, disputes to settle and whatnot. Over that, he didn't even have the time to talk to his Alexander the entire week.   
  
Not a single word.  
  
So maybe ... maybe that was it.   
  
That'd be understandable. The lack of Alec in his life- something he's  _so_ not used to and doesn't want to be ever too- making him restless. Hah, of course.   
  
_But what if something-_  
  
"Mm-mm," Magnus picks up his phone and dials an all-too-familiar number, frowning when it goes straight to voicemail.   
  
He tries for a second, and a third and then on the fourth try, finally Alec picks up.   
  
Except it's not Alec.   
  
"Magnus?"  
  
"Hello, Isabelle." He greets the younger Lightwood sibling and furrows when he hears her .. sniffing. "Is everything okay? Isabelle, what's wrong?"   
  
He feels his heart clench in his chest as she lets out a sob, and the words that escape her lips next feel like someone poured a bucket of ice cold water over him.   
  
"It's Alec."   
  
Suddenly, it's difficult to breathe and his hand is flying out involuntarily to grasp the nearest thing and it takes him a moment to realize that his knees gave away under him.   
  
He closes his eyes, blunt fingernails digging into the wood as he takes a deep breath.   
  
"Wh-" His voice shakes and he swallows hard before clearing his throat. Then in a steady voice, he continues, "What about him?"  
  
"H-He's hurt. He said not to tell you, but it's been hours now and he's not waking up and I am so -"   
  
"Slow down, sweetheart." He cuts her off, "It's gonna be okay. He's going to be okay, I promise."   
  
And that was a promise he meant to keep.   
  
With purple and a whoosh of wind, he's gone.   
  
. . / . .   
  
"Alec!"   
  
The pain strikes just a split second later, his entire body crashing to the ground as his vision turns hazy.   
  
Suddenly there's hands on his face, pulling his head over a comparatively softer surface than the cold, hard ground.   
  
"Alec! Hey, look at me. Okay? Here, I'm here."   
  
"Izzy?" He squints his eyes and he lets out a sharp grunt as his shoulder hurts like a fucking bitch, god. "Shit, it hurts."   
  
"We need to get you back to the Institute." She says before turning to Jace who was killing the last bit of demons and rushing towards them.  
  
"You're such an idiot, Alec." He mutters as he drops to his knees beside the two. "Izzy, call Magnus and tell him to meet us at the Institute. We need to-"   
  
"No." Alec interjects sharply. "He doesn't- He can't know. He has a lot of things to take care of. I don't wanna bother him."   
  
Both Jace and Izzy flash him incredulous looks.   
  
"Bother him? What the hell, Alec? He freaking _loves_ you. I'm sure nothing is more important than y-"   
  
"He doesn't need to know cause I'm gonna be fine." Alex grits his teeth as he sits up- or tries to, anyway, blinking rapidly as darkness begins clouding his vision.  
  
"I'm .. gonna be ... fine."   
  
And then there's sobs and hands everywhere and just, darkness.   
  
Just peaceful, painless darkness.   
  
. . / . .   
  
  
There's a dull headache behind his eyes when he wakes up. He blinks a couple of times before raising a hand and rubbing it across his face, remembering what had happened.    
  
It's only then he notices the other presence in the room.   
  
There, at the side of the bed, lies Magnus, half on bed, half on the floor, hands firmly clutching one corner of the covers spread over Alec's body.   
  
His eyes are closed, and his hair looks like he'd run his hands through them a thousand times which he undoubtedly had.   
  
His body felt stiff but when he shifted his position, Magnus jolts awake, eyes frantic as they looked around before widening at Alec's awake form.

Alec opens his mouth to say something- anything, because there is no doubt that Magnus is furious over not being informed and then closes it when he realizes he can't string words together that could somehow explain how he could've died and Magnus still wouldn't know.   
  
"I see you're awake."   
  
Magnus speaks up when he realizes Alec won't, and Alec hates every bit of it. From the way Magnus' eyes remain cold to the way he stands at the edge of the bed, hands firmly turned into fists on his sides instead of pulling him into a hug and _oh my god, I've fucked up so bad-_   
  
"Magnus, I-I can- "   
  
The door opens and Isabelle steps in with Jace on her tow. Her face visibly brightens up at the sight of her brother and then she's at his side, pulling him into a bone-crushing hug, totally oblivious to everything else.   
  
Alec allows himself to melt in the embrace, burying his face in his little sister's shoulder and welcoming the smell of lavender that invades his nose.   
  
"Alec, you're okay!" Izzy exclaims, a huge smile on her face which makes the corners of his own lips to rise as she pulls away.   
  
"Yeah, man. Good to know you're okay." Jace adds, a smile of his own.   
  
"Seeing that everyone seems to be okay, I should get going." Magnus announces, straightening his clothes.   
  
"No way, Magnus. You didn't leave his side for even a minute and now that he's awake, you can't be leaving and that is unless you're angry about him not - _oh_."  
  
Izzy stops her ramble, the smile dropping from her face as she looks to and fro between the two, finally realizing the tension in the air.   
  
"I..You two should talk." Izzy says, standing up.   
  
"There is no-"   
  
"Let me rephrase that," She stares at the shorter male, "You two need to talk and you will."  
  
Then, Izzy and Jace proceed to walk out of the room, not before sending a reassuring smile in Alec's direction which was not reassuring at all to Alec, if he were to be completely honest.   
  
Neithe say anything for several minutes before Magnus clears his throat.   
  
"Like I said, I have places to be. So if you'll excuse me-"   
  
"Magnus, please let me explai-"   
  
"There is nothing to explain. You almost died, but didn't. That's it. No big deal." Magnus' tone is sharp and Alec's head hangs low.   
  
"I'm sorry. You were busy and I didn't want to worry you."   
  
"Worry me? _Worry_ me?" A mirthless laugh escapes his lips as he throws his hands up. "Well, too bad cause I was, in fact, worried. Worried that I might lose the person who means the world and more to me because he didn't tell me, just because he was worried that _I_ would be worried."   
  
"I .. Magnus.."   
  
But he's not done as he continues.  
  
"Maybe it's my fault. I failed to show you how nothing in this world would be more important than you, and that for me, it'll always be you who comes first and I just," he breaks off, shaking his head and inhaling sharply.  
  
Alec's bottom lip quivers and his teeth clamp down on it knowing what was coming. _No, Alec, get it together, do not cry._   
  
"I'm sorry."   
  
His voice is barely above a whisper and his knuckles are white as they clutch the white covers, breath ragged and eyes closed.   
  
He feels delicate hands grab the sides of his face and tilt it upwards, making him open his eyes. Only to look into the glassy eyes that mirrored his own, rough pads of thumbs running over his cheekbones.   
  
A choked sob escapes his lips and then he's engulfed in the all-too familiar warmth of his lover. His hands reach out to grab the sleeves of the shirt Magnus is wearing, and he holds on tight, burying his face in his chest the familiar scent a calming to the storms in his heart.   
  
"Shh, sweetheart, it's okay." Magnus' voice is soothing as he rubs circles on his shaking back. When he calms down, he pulls away and takes a seat on the side of his bed, a hand resting on his cheek.   
  
"I love you, Alexander, so, so much. But you can't do this to me again. Promise me?"   
  
"Promise." Alec says softly, nodding before moving the covers and shyly adding, "Stay with me?"   
  
At this, Magnus flashes him a sweet smile, one of those that never fail to make him feel all warm inside.   
  
"Always, my love."


End file.
